Sunday, March 27, 2005
Thursday, March 24, 2005
Juicy A Does Martha Stewart....again!
Ok, im more of a slutty version of Ms. Stewart, but a domestic diva I surely am!
This is the second time Ive tried to impress the boy by feeding him stuff that takes me hours to make. And, like the cabbage rolls before them, the lasagna was consumed quite quickly and while under the influence of al-ky-hol. In fact, it was us wasted scarfing down two-thirds of this pan on a Wednesday night drunk at about 2 am. What can be expected? We were hungry from all that humpin in the women's washroom at the bar....
I bet Martha never had that problem.
This is the second time Ive tried to impress the boy by feeding him stuff that takes me hours to make. And, like the cabbage rolls before them, the lasagna was consumed quite quickly and while under the influence of al-ky-hol. In fact, it was us wasted scarfing down two-thirds of this pan on a Wednesday night drunk at about 2 am. What can be expected? We were hungry from all that humpin in the women's washroom at the bar....
I bet Martha never had that problem.
Sluts of the World Unite!
http://www.okcupid.com/slut
Hmmm. Love taking these types of tests...but is it a bad thing to be so dang proud of just how slutty i am? Maybe if you ask nice ill tell ya my score.... [it was rather high, BTW.]
On another test, I also found out that im really good at using difficult words properly. Me speak gooder than youre going to speaking.
Hmmm. Love taking these types of tests...but is it a bad thing to be so dang proud of just how slutty i am? Maybe if you ask nice ill tell ya my score.... [it was rather high, BTW.]
On another test, I also found out that im really good at using difficult words properly. Me speak gooder than youre going to speaking.
Monday, March 21, 2005
Rock and Friggin Roll!
Dude! I had a job interview. At a law firm, even. Cross yer fingers.
ps. The boy situation is good. I have to stop being such a freak out. Or at least not a dramatic one. I guess when you get 2 people who are admittedly stubborn and hot headed together its not surprising to have a little bit of a spat now and then. Sure is a lot better than my past sit-quietly-and-be-really-upset-and-pretend-everything-is-fine routine I useda do with other boys...
pps Big props to Juicy's first and only fan Mark in Australia! Woot!
ps. The boy situation is good. I have to stop being such a freak out. Or at least not a dramatic one. I guess when you get 2 people who are admittedly stubborn and hot headed together its not surprising to have a little bit of a spat now and then. Sure is a lot better than my past sit-quietly-and-be-really-upset-and-pretend-everything-is-fine routine I useda do with other boys...
pps Big props to Juicy's first and only fan Mark in Australia! Woot!
Friday, March 18, 2005
Puttin 'hip' in Hypocrite
So like mere hours after the last post, I told the boy that I have a serious jealousy problem...and that something needed to change, or it was gonna cause some big time problems for us. Long story short, we kinda had it out. Our convo went from me trying to be better...to him telling me anecdotes about some of his past scores... to him insinuating that i was overly promiscuous [ yeah, I know I know... But he didn't need to bring it up]. The incident ended with me sleeping on the couch for a few hours and smoking some cigarettes.
We are okay now. Its been fine. And I have noticed that since then, I joke about him checking out other girls but I haven't noticed him actually doing it. But it has dredged up another concern for me-- his past is as bad as mine. Some of the stories he told me were pretty uncool. I mean, I admit to humpin roommates, guys whose names I cant recall [ or maybe never actually bothered to get], a bunch of friends within the same week, a guy in a coatroom... blah blah blah... but I really don't wanna think of the boy in the same way. Hello, my name is Juicy, and Im a fuckin hypocrite.
Maybe this is the old madonna-whore complex that ive heard about guys having... Everyone wants to go to bed with a porn star, and wake up with a virgin. I like to think of it as all my boys come to me with a clean slate, in a bubble wrapped package with no past....and go back into that box when im done with them. I don't like to picture them with exes...or with people they date after we're through.
I dunno. Maybe this is a good thing. Maybe being with someone who has been down the dirty road like I have will understand why I don't want to be like that anymore and help me stay on the less-dirty [ lets be realistic-- am I ever going to want to take the 'clean' route? the non- naughty route? I fuggin don't think so...] road.
Maybe I should stop being a bloody hypocrite and just let myself be happy for a change.
We are okay now. Its been fine. And I have noticed that since then, I joke about him checking out other girls but I haven't noticed him actually doing it. But it has dredged up another concern for me-- his past is as bad as mine. Some of the stories he told me were pretty uncool. I mean, I admit to humpin roommates, guys whose names I cant recall [ or maybe never actually bothered to get], a bunch of friends within the same week, a guy in a coatroom... blah blah blah... but I really don't wanna think of the boy in the same way. Hello, my name is Juicy, and Im a fuckin hypocrite.
Maybe this is the old madonna-whore complex that ive heard about guys having... Everyone wants to go to bed with a porn star, and wake up with a virgin. I like to think of it as all my boys come to me with a clean slate, in a bubble wrapped package with no past....and go back into that box when im done with them. I don't like to picture them with exes...or with people they date after we're through.
I dunno. Maybe this is a good thing. Maybe being with someone who has been down the dirty road like I have will understand why I don't want to be like that anymore and help me stay on the less-dirty [ lets be realistic-- am I ever going to want to take the 'clean' route? the non- naughty route? I fuggin don't think so...] road.
Maybe I should stop being a bloody hypocrite and just let myself be happy for a change.
Thursday, March 17, 2005
www.tryingtobeabetterperson.com
Ok. So Ive noticed that my blogorama has turned from a day to day account of my scoring successes and drinking victories, to me whinging [pronounced "win-ge-ing"...its sumpin the the aussies useda say to me] about things. Am I boring you? Sorry.
Anyhoo, so im trying to be all mentally healthy and shite and forgive my exes... uh, trying is the key word. And im trying to be positive about the new relationship...which y'all know is like uber difficult for me, being that im so dang pessimistic. So whats the new chapter in the world of juicy trying to find the happy, pink little person inside of the angry red crusty biatch? Im trying to not be the queen of jealousy anymore. Seriously.
I fear ex girlfriends. I fear female friends. I fear waitresses that are a little too chatty and pleasant. I fear possible or potential girls who may give out phone numbers when im not there. I fear girls that live in my building that may share elevators with him. I fear girls on tv, in magazines, on the radio. Even that bitch who does the voice mail on Telus.
Im mental. I know.
I think to uproot this little unhealthy stump in my life, I need to find out who planted it. And, honestly, I cant remember a time that i wasnt like this. It predates Kelly, Chad...Hell, even Jason in High School. But I think it just got worse when i realised that all my boyfriends seem to go back to their exes after dating me. And then to hear from 2 guys that i was dating that we "werent serious" and that they were actually looking for other people while with me just made it worse.
But something I have totally noticed... the more i fall for the boy, the more that it arises in my mind. Like Im looking for a reason to slow myself down and stop things with them.
Hell. I aint gonna solve this right now. But im trying. The new [and improving?!?!] Juicy A will continue...
Anyhoo, so im trying to be all mentally healthy and shite and forgive my exes... uh, trying is the key word. And im trying to be positive about the new relationship...which y'all know is like uber difficult for me, being that im so dang pessimistic. So whats the new chapter in the world of juicy trying to find the happy, pink little person inside of the angry red crusty biatch? Im trying to not be the queen of jealousy anymore. Seriously.
I fear ex girlfriends. I fear female friends. I fear waitresses that are a little too chatty and pleasant. I fear possible or potential girls who may give out phone numbers when im not there. I fear girls that live in my building that may share elevators with him. I fear girls on tv, in magazines, on the radio. Even that bitch who does the voice mail on Telus.
Im mental. I know.
I think to uproot this little unhealthy stump in my life, I need to find out who planted it. And, honestly, I cant remember a time that i wasnt like this. It predates Kelly, Chad...Hell, even Jason in High School. But I think it just got worse when i realised that all my boyfriends seem to go back to their exes after dating me. And then to hear from 2 guys that i was dating that we "werent serious" and that they were actually looking for other people while with me just made it worse.
But something I have totally noticed... the more i fall for the boy, the more that it arises in my mind. Like Im looking for a reason to slow myself down and stop things with them.
Hell. I aint gonna solve this right now. But im trying. The new [and improving?!?!] Juicy A will continue...
Wednesday, March 16, 2005
Saturday, March 12, 2005
Why am i sad today?
I really dont know why, but im very sad right now. Listening to the sad music [Beatles--Youve Got to Hide Your Love Away/ Barenaked ladies--Call and Answer/ No Doubt-- Simple Kind of Life/ Sheryl Crowe-- Strong Enough], laying on the couch, wearing Jer's hoodie, and trying not to cry.
I do, however, have theories as to why im sad. One, Im really hung over and sometimes my mental state gets a little amplified with said condition... i get a little forlorn about something and all of a sudden im mopey. Two, its cold windy and the sun isnt shining. And, thirdly Im depressed about the fact that Im falling for someone, which i know makes absolutely no sense whatsoever.
Im scared. Really scared. Petrified even that everything will be built up and go wonderful [as it has been] for a while...then right when im comfortable, happy, and have let myself fall in love...Boom. Ill get abandoned yet again.
I know i cant hide myself away and never date anyone again to avoid being hurt. And id be a fucking idiot if i broke up with Jer for fear that he'd someday dump me. I mean, i keep bouncing back after some really shitty times and some heinous breakups. Its just something i gotta do. And keep doing. [thats the reason for the infinity tattoo on my back BTW] I never thought i would fall in love again after Ian. I had all but decided that i was done. But, I had that lil glimmer of hope that it could happen again. [and thats the reason why i have the red star on my side]
Ive forgiven myself a lot in the past few mths. But i think i need to forgive other people too. Kelly-- for moving on so quickly; Ian-- for not loving me enough to wait for me; Mark-- for abandoning me at a time when i needed him [or anyone] to love me more than anything.
I just dont know if i can.
Anyways, Im feeling a little better right now. Ranting usually does that for me. Then again, the sun is finally shining outside. Mystery solved, i must be sad cuz of the weather.
I do, however, have theories as to why im sad. One, Im really hung over and sometimes my mental state gets a little amplified with said condition... i get a little forlorn about something and all of a sudden im mopey. Two, its cold windy and the sun isnt shining. And, thirdly Im depressed about the fact that Im falling for someone, which i know makes absolutely no sense whatsoever.
Im scared. Really scared. Petrified even that everything will be built up and go wonderful [as it has been] for a while...then right when im comfortable, happy, and have let myself fall in love...Boom. Ill get abandoned yet again.
I know i cant hide myself away and never date anyone again to avoid being hurt. And id be a fucking idiot if i broke up with Jer for fear that he'd someday dump me. I mean, i keep bouncing back after some really shitty times and some heinous breakups. Its just something i gotta do. And keep doing. [thats the reason for the infinity tattoo on my back BTW] I never thought i would fall in love again after Ian. I had all but decided that i was done. But, I had that lil glimmer of hope that it could happen again. [and thats the reason why i have the red star on my side]
Ive forgiven myself a lot in the past few mths. But i think i need to forgive other people too. Kelly-- for moving on so quickly; Ian-- for not loving me enough to wait for me; Mark-- for abandoning me at a time when i needed him [or anyone] to love me more than anything.
I just dont know if i can.
Anyways, Im feeling a little better right now. Ranting usually does that for me. Then again, the sun is finally shining outside. Mystery solved, i must be sad cuz of the weather.
Thursday, March 10, 2005
Status Report: March ' 05
Erm... not that much goin down.
1. No job
2. No money
But....
3. No more loneliness [gots me a cute, funny, horny, sometimes incorrigible boyfriend]
4. No worries really.
So I guess this status report is: things are okay, could be better, but not complainin'.
1. No job
2. No money
But....
3. No more loneliness [gots me a cute, funny, horny, sometimes incorrigible boyfriend]
4. No worries really.
So I guess this status report is: things are okay, could be better, but not complainin'.
Sunday, March 06, 2005
[big sigh]
Sorry... havent been around much to be writing.
Fuck... Im totally into the new boy. And, quite strangely for me, the boy is in to me too. We went to Radium Hot Springs for the day and had waaay too much fun. We got really stoned, ate tons of shit, 'christened' the handicapped washroom at the Park, and basically just did a lot of crazy/silly/goofy things together. And, doubly strange, we discussed and decided to be exclusive. I know. So soon...and so, well, so unlike the guys I normally end up with. There will be no guy tellin me after weve been together 2 mths that we arent serious and that they werent my boyfriend after all...and thats good. Cuz i like this one. A lot. Tons, even.
Yeah.
Fuck... Im totally into the new boy. And, quite strangely for me, the boy is in to me too. We went to Radium Hot Springs for the day and had waaay too much fun. We got really stoned, ate tons of shit, 'christened' the handicapped washroom at the Park, and basically just did a lot of crazy/silly/goofy things together. And, doubly strange, we discussed and decided to be exclusive. I know. So soon...and so, well, so unlike the guys I normally end up with. There will be no guy tellin me after weve been together 2 mths that we arent serious and that they werent my boyfriend after all...and thats good. Cuz i like this one. A lot. Tons, even.
Yeah.
Tuesday, March 01, 2005
Storytellin'
In case you havent noticed, I like to tell stories. Im friggin filled with them, yo. I like to tell people about all the crazy shite that i do, that Ive seen, and what i plan to do. However, there are some stories that I rarely tell-- I havent even told you guys yet for these stories. Ones that only a few people know.
Which makes it totally odd in the fact that Ive only known the new boy for 6 days... and he knows BOTH of my killer dynamite evil and rarely told tales. So why have i told the new guy? I dunno. Maybe because both came up in conversation and I was able to tell [or maybe 'confess'] to both of them? That im comfortable with him and I feel that i can tell him? Or, maybe the fact that I never told Mila the one story-- and it drove me nutbar. I couldnt bring it up casually, but it was so crucial to my life story, that it needed to be told.
Well, we'll see if me confessing so early works out to my advantage or not. I mean, there are still things he doesnt know, or that anyone knows, but definately are not things that i need to declare to feel better. At the very least, if it doesnt end up being a good idea, it gives me another story to tell.
Which makes it totally odd in the fact that Ive only known the new boy for 6 days... and he knows BOTH of my killer dynamite evil and rarely told tales. So why have i told the new guy? I dunno. Maybe because both came up in conversation and I was able to tell [or maybe 'confess'] to both of them? That im comfortable with him and I feel that i can tell him? Or, maybe the fact that I never told Mila the one story-- and it drove me nutbar. I couldnt bring it up casually, but it was so crucial to my life story, that it needed to be told.
Well, we'll see if me confessing so early works out to my advantage or not. I mean, there are still things he doesnt know, or that anyone knows, but definately are not things that i need to declare to feel better. At the very least, if it doesnt end up being a good idea, it gives me another story to tell.
Sunday, February 27, 2005
Friday, February 25, 2005
I think it might have happened...
...Im afraid to date people. Im afraid to fall for someone or want someone around, on the assumption that as soon as i get hooked on them, they'll leave me.
Things with the new guy are great. Super great. Our date on wednesday was wikked awesome...we had tons of fun, some great conversations, and [although i know i've said before that i dont do this with guys im dating] some super sex. And then he came over here yesterday and we had some more [and some more this morning].
Now, normally, i would be overjoyed to meet someone this fun and who obviously enjoys humpin as much as i do...but something just wont let me. Whenever I think about him, i honestly do get the butterflies. Yet, then i remember that ive had those before. I had them with Marco and Mila...and neither worked out. I know that im over Mila now... I saw him on Saturday at the bar and it didnt make me yearn for him. In fact, it made me angry and annoyed.
So now im worried. [What, me worry? Yes-- and how!] Is this temporary, or have i joined the masses of bitter and closed off people who never give anyone a chance? Fuck i hope not.
Things with the new guy are great. Super great. Our date on wednesday was wikked awesome...we had tons of fun, some great conversations, and [although i know i've said before that i dont do this with guys im dating] some super sex. And then he came over here yesterday and we had some more [and some more this morning].
Now, normally, i would be overjoyed to meet someone this fun and who obviously enjoys humpin as much as i do...but something just wont let me. Whenever I think about him, i honestly do get the butterflies. Yet, then i remember that ive had those before. I had them with Marco and Mila...and neither worked out. I know that im over Mila now... I saw him on Saturday at the bar and it didnt make me yearn for him. In fact, it made me angry and annoyed.
So now im worried. [What, me worry? Yes-- and how!] Is this temporary, or have i joined the masses of bitter and closed off people who never give anyone a chance? Fuck i hope not.
Wednesday, February 23, 2005
How old do you act? [try to look surprised]
17
Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe.
13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world.
20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences.
30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more!
40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.
Hmm... no real surprise there. I certainly have been acting like a carefree teen lately. Besides Speed Racer and the Aussie Geologist, I have a date with another dude tonight. We're going to watch a hockey game and eat wings. Maybe we'll have a milkshake and share a banana split too....[thats what 17 yr olds do, right?]
Tuesday, February 22, 2005
The Twisted Element experience...
Pre Gay bar--
The T-shirt says it all: Im a preppy girl who is both demure and innocent. The perfect combination for the newest crazy gay bar in Calgaria.
The T-shirt says it all: Im a preppy girl who is both demure and innocent. The perfect combination for the newest crazy gay bar in Calgaria.
And then the return home...
Ok ok... the demure girl from the above picture was corrupted. [hmmm only took 4 red bull and vodkas] So I got home alone [read as: my friend picked up. Im a good fag hag!] and still wanted to party. So i turned on much music and decided to dance my brains out. And, naturally, I decided to take a few pics...
Well, these are the most representative of the 40 plus photos i took while dancin like a fool when i got home from the gay bar alone.
Well, these are the most representative of the 40 plus photos i took while dancin like a fool when i got home from the gay bar alone.
Monday, February 21, 2005
Fun Fun Fun!
Are you evil? find out at Hilowitz.com
p.s. had a totally nuts weekend...involving lotsa booze, some humpin, a trip to a gay bar, telling off mila, some crazy phone/cam sex, and lotsa pizza.
Friday, February 18, 2005
Thursday, February 17, 2005
The best website ever... if only i woulda listened to it [sniff]
Hmm...maybe a few years [14 to be exact] late. Maybe i should consider re-virgination...nah, that takes 7 yrs and i dont have time like that...
Anyways: Will all the girls please rise and say with me...
I, [MY NAME], hereby pledge:
1. To never let grubby boys touch me – unless it's just fun innocent stuff like tripping me and pulling my hair. (But only the hair on my head!)
2. To never wear trampy stuff like shorts or t-shirts or open-toed shoes, which basically tell horny perverts that I'm a major tramp who's just asking for it.
3. To never do rough stuff like ride horsies or bikes with hard seats, which could break my vagina's freshness seal and make me totally unlovable.
4. To never let tampons violate the sanctity of my hoo-hoo, because tampons are really nothing more than thirsty little albino penises.
5. To never have premarital sex, because Jesus doesn't want anyone messing around inside my girly hole until after His church makes some money off a wedding.
I understand that abstaining from sex protects me from:
-->Super-expensive dry cleaning bills for getting crusty sex goop off all my good silk and cashmere stuff.
-->Forcing my wonderful parents to use "tough love" and kick me out of the house for embarrassing them by being such a little whore.
--> Having adoption-hungry homosexuals circle my pregnant belly like vultures, hell-bent on corrupting my unwanted bastard child with their sicko "love."
Hah. For boys... www.sexisforfags.com
Anyways: Will all the girls please rise and say with me...
I, [MY NAME], hereby pledge:
1. To never let grubby boys touch me – unless it's just fun innocent stuff like tripping me and pulling my hair. (But only the hair on my head!)
2. To never wear trampy stuff like shorts or t-shirts or open-toed shoes, which basically tell horny perverts that I'm a major tramp who's just asking for it.
3. To never do rough stuff like ride horsies or bikes with hard seats, which could break my vagina's freshness seal and make me totally unlovable.
4. To never let tampons violate the sanctity of my hoo-hoo, because tampons are really nothing more than thirsty little albino penises.
5. To never have premarital sex, because Jesus doesn't want anyone messing around inside my girly hole until after His church makes some money off a wedding.
I understand that abstaining from sex protects me from:
-->Super-expensive dry cleaning bills for getting crusty sex goop off all my good silk and cashmere stuff.
-->Forcing my wonderful parents to use "tough love" and kick me out of the house for embarrassing them by being such a little whore.
--> Having adoption-hungry homosexuals circle my pregnant belly like vultures, hell-bent on corrupting my unwanted bastard child with their sicko "love."
Hah. For boys... www.sexisforfags.com
Regular Post- date posting...
Im not going to comment on the fact that i havent seen Mila in a month...or that he sent me some pictures from his christmas party and it literally broke my heart...or that our first date was also on a wednesday, approx. 3 mos. ago... [oh wait, i guess i just DID comment on it, ug.]
but i went on a date last night.
As you can prolly guess, we drank, made small talk, then made out. Usual stuff. He's nice enough, rather cute, and seems fun...but why did i keep closing my eyes while making out and thinking of someone else [who actually wasnt as good at making out as this guy, as an aside] everytime? Why did i hope that he would message me while i was making out with said new guy, and then id tell him 'oh sorry i missed your message cuz i was with someone else? Or have him call me right now wanting me back, so i could say 'I've moved on".
Man im messed up. I wish he'd just let me be so i could actually move on...Damn. This was supposed to be a post about the new guy, not the old one. Double damn.
but i went on a date last night.
As you can prolly guess, we drank, made small talk, then made out. Usual stuff. He's nice enough, rather cute, and seems fun...but why did i keep closing my eyes while making out and thinking of someone else [who actually wasnt as good at making out as this guy, as an aside] everytime? Why did i hope that he would message me while i was making out with said new guy, and then id tell him 'oh sorry i missed your message cuz i was with someone else? Or have him call me right now wanting me back, so i could say 'I've moved on".
Man im messed up. I wish he'd just let me be so i could actually move on...Damn. This was supposed to be a post about the new guy, not the old one. Double damn.
Tuesday, February 15, 2005
hitting the "NEXT BLOG" button on my page...
gets you:
-- conservative rhetoric that would make Rush Limbaugh blush [sample: ' but i totally agree that Jesus Christ is our saviour despite the fact that i didnt make that much on the bottle drive for our church...ps. no gays no abortions but many executions.]
-- some asian teens talking about which J-Pop band they love [soo good =:X) muah!!!]
-- angry goth kids in middle America with cryptic names and depressing icons [mystycysm pain... WTF?]
--something in Spanish or Portugese
Arent u glad you know juicy? Yeah, and juicy loves u too.
--------
Surreal note:
somewhere someone is blogging about how they hit the 'next blog' key and had to read about some 20 something slut who complains all the time and drinks heavily.....
--------
-- conservative rhetoric that would make Rush Limbaugh blush [sample: ' but i totally agree that Jesus Christ is our saviour despite the fact that i didnt make that much on the bottle drive for our church...ps. no gays no abortions but many executions.]
-- some asian teens talking about which J-Pop band they love [soo good =:X) muah!!!]
-- angry goth kids in middle America with cryptic names and depressing icons [mystycysm pain... WTF?]
--something in Spanish or Portugese
Arent u glad you know juicy? Yeah, and juicy loves u too.
--------
Surreal note:
somewhere someone is blogging about how they hit the 'next blog' key and had to read about some 20 something slut who complains all the time and drinks heavily.....
--------
VD: partie deux
hmm page 11...
except before the going home alone, going to Ceilis [which i actually hate] and then coming home by myself. Then, looking on MSN, considered going on Lemontonic [a different version of the same shite as the lava] decide to post this and then go to bed...
Happy friggin' v day juicy.
except before the going home alone, going to Ceilis [which i actually hate] and then coming home by myself. Then, looking on MSN, considered going on Lemontonic [a different version of the same shite as the lava] decide to post this and then go to bed...
Happy friggin' v day juicy.
Monday, February 14, 2005
Valentines Day
bah.
you prolly can guess how i feel about today. lets play chose your own adventure...and then ill update u later as to which came true.
a] If Juicy A stays home and gets stoned, watches Degrassi TNG and eats a bunch of chicken go to page 42.
b] If Juicy A gets drunk with the Bridesmaids...but then they need to go home early cuz they all have to work, so she comes home and does some pseudo lecherous MSN-ing go to page 11.
c] If Juicy A gets drunk with the Bridesmaids, who then drag her to Cowboys, where she meets a boy...makes out with him, then takes him home... go to page 67.
you prolly can guess how i feel about today. lets play chose your own adventure...and then ill update u later as to which came true.
a] If Juicy A stays home and gets stoned, watches Degrassi TNG and eats a bunch of chicken go to page 42.
b] If Juicy A gets drunk with the Bridesmaids...but then they need to go home early cuz they all have to work, so she comes home and does some pseudo lecherous MSN-ing go to page 11.
c] If Juicy A gets drunk with the Bridesmaids, who then drag her to Cowboys, where she meets a boy...makes out with him, then takes him home... go to page 67.
Friday, February 11, 2005
My new Roomate
Well, Ive been discussing it for a really long time...but i finally found a new roomate. Meet Kingsley [if you have seen 'The Life Aquatic of Steve Zissou' you'll understand why the name is funny...and yes, im going to refer to my fishie as Ned at times]...my new Siamese Fighting Fish.
I have often compared my current boyfriend to my fishie [Dumbass and Dexter = neurotic; Marco and Pete = laid back and unexcitable] and am concerned over the fact that im not really seeing anyone right now to be K's doppelganger. I sure hope hes not comparable to Mila-- contradictory, confused, messed up, and driving me crazy. If anything I'd say this fishie is prolly the most social one that Ive had. He's always staring at me and trying to see what im doing. Oh great, my next boyfriend is going to be a stalker. Anyways, here's to Kingsley.
I have often compared my current boyfriend to my fishie [Dumbass and Dexter = neurotic; Marco and Pete = laid back and unexcitable] and am concerned over the fact that im not really seeing anyone right now to be K's doppelganger. I sure hope hes not comparable to Mila-- contradictory, confused, messed up, and driving me crazy. If anything I'd say this fishie is prolly the most social one that Ive had. He's always staring at me and trying to see what im doing. Oh great, my next boyfriend is going to be a stalker. Anyways, here's to Kingsley.
Wednesday, February 09, 2005
Awesoma Powa! For Best Lucky Attack!
All i have been doing lately is playing with my webcam, looking on the internet, and watching the TV. Right now-- Im in anime mode for all three...
Tuesday, February 08, 2005
Hey Lenny!
Check out my cable internet and tv!
Lenny: Wow! Looks like the kind ive had for 3 years...
Me: Are ya jealous?
Lenny: But i have the same...
Me: He's jealous
[Note: if you dont watch the simpsons in a pseudo addictive manner, this wont make lotsa sense to you...or any at all. Needless to say, the original episode was about Homer getting a big comfy chair after becoming a stonecutter--the same chair that Lenny had and Homer coveted... Fuck. Ok. So i got cable internet and tv today. I officially entered the 21st century. Blah. Well, Im excited about it]
Lenny: Wow! Looks like the kind ive had for 3 years...
Me: Are ya jealous?
Lenny: But i have the same...
Me: He's jealous
[Note: if you dont watch the simpsons in a pseudo addictive manner, this wont make lotsa sense to you...or any at all. Needless to say, the original episode was about Homer getting a big comfy chair after becoming a stonecutter--the same chair that Lenny had and Homer coveted... Fuck. Ok. So i got cable internet and tv today. I officially entered the 21st century. Blah. Well, Im excited about it]
Monday, February 07, 2005
The Return of the [Somewhat Reluctant] Bridesmaid
Saturday saw the end of an era: the Mercury is now officially closed. I've had a lot of fun there over the years: I had my first ever martini there [a delilah] in 1996, some of my fave Marco memories are from when he DJ'd there and we went there after almost every FMC party.
Of course, I couldnt exactly go alone, so i recruited some of the bridesmaids to join me in the fond farewell...and in true [back on the wagon] bridesmaid style, we all picked up. I seem to have been re-instated with full bridesmaid honors-- I just dont know if i am ready to accept the duties.
Man, was I wasted. I drank 6 beers and about 10 shots before we even left to go there. I almost started a fight there within the first 15 minutes. Three girls who were prolly 5 ft tall [at the most] walked through my friends and i said "oh look, tiny people". Now i didnt mean it in a mean way, but the 3 interpreted it as an insult. [in retrospect, it wasnt the nicest thing to say...] One chick said "that was fucking rude". Again, due to my intoxication, I just laughed. So she pinched me. Yeah, thats right. Pinched me. Like it was recess and the bell just rang. So for the rest of the night i was making a big deal about being terrified of all tiny people...especially those who pinch.
As for the random, he was young: only 22. And i can tell you i prolly wasnt ready for it. I thought about a certain someone else the whole time. Yesterday, I couldnt sleep in my bed because i felt too guilty. I kept looking at Edgar Moose-ilini [the moose whom we share joint custody] last night and almost crying.
Anyways, Im gonna miss you, Mercury. It was always a good time.
Of course, I couldnt exactly go alone, so i recruited some of the bridesmaids to join me in the fond farewell...and in true [back on the wagon] bridesmaid style, we all picked up. I seem to have been re-instated with full bridesmaid honors-- I just dont know if i am ready to accept the duties.
Man, was I wasted. I drank 6 beers and about 10 shots before we even left to go there. I almost started a fight there within the first 15 minutes. Three girls who were prolly 5 ft tall [at the most] walked through my friends and i said "oh look, tiny people". Now i didnt mean it in a mean way, but the 3 interpreted it as an insult. [in retrospect, it wasnt the nicest thing to say...] One chick said "that was fucking rude". Again, due to my intoxication, I just laughed. So she pinched me. Yeah, thats right. Pinched me. Like it was recess and the bell just rang. So for the rest of the night i was making a big deal about being terrified of all tiny people...especially those who pinch.
As for the random, he was young: only 22. And i can tell you i prolly wasnt ready for it. I thought about a certain someone else the whole time. Yesterday, I couldnt sleep in my bed because i felt too guilty. I kept looking at Edgar Moose-ilini [the moose whom we share joint custody] last night and almost crying.
Anyways, Im gonna miss you, Mercury. It was always a good time.
Saturday, February 05, 2005
And now that ive figured out how to use Picasa...
... I know Ive been talking about it for as long as I can honestly remember, but its finally coming to fruititon. I am setting up a photoblog for all my "hump attack" photos.
Right now its sparse, but im planning on gettting my hands on a scanner and diggin' out my old photo CDs and making it the hump attack site that we've all waited so patiently for.
www.juicyhumps.blogspot.com
Right now its sparse, but im planning on gettting my hands on a scanner and diggin' out my old photo CDs and making it the hump attack site that we've all waited so patiently for.
www.juicyhumps.blogspot.com
Juicy A's first photo-documentary: I got stoned and had the munchies...
[ED Note: First, start at the last picture and scroll up.
Second, who is ed?]
that was one gooood idea, juicy!
Second, who is ed?]
that was one gooood idea, juicy!
Friday, February 04, 2005
Less than Subliminal Messaging
So here i am, day 04 with the new compy [and no, i still havent figured out how to do the picture thing...] and besides not leaving my little stool for more than a few hours a night to sleep, i havent been doing much else. Especially, I have been logging a lot of time on the ole MSN messenger-- now that I have the webcam, the fun has been doubled, tripled even!
But here's something i've noticed since the new camera was introduced into my lil electronic world... all my guy friends [mostly exes, actually] have suggested that I show them my boobs or hoohoo. Its almost to the point that i could set a timer, and then patiently wait for about 2 minutes, before they ask. Yeah, all guys I know would know that Im very open about talkin about sex and kinky shite... but do they have to be so obvious? To the point where i have to laugh it off and say "that would cost you" and then they say they were kidding... but then about 15 minutes later they suggest it again.
Its quite funny that Ive been online savvy since 1993...but not until very recently allowed myself to have a digital camera or webcam. Its like I somehow knew that i would be tempted to get nakers and put the pics on the internet...and it wasnt until it was absolutely the WORST thing i could do that i actually bought the technology. I mean, if i got caught by a lawyer in town, word travels fast..and it would likely be the end of my career in calgary.
So I guess this is just a warning to my readers: dont expect me to post any T and A pics of myself on here...and if you see me on messenger, just dont ask. That being said, im going to go web chat some more. Fully clothed. Stop those thoughts, sicko.
But here's something i've noticed since the new camera was introduced into my lil electronic world... all my guy friends [mostly exes, actually] have suggested that I show them my boobs or hoohoo. Its almost to the point that i could set a timer, and then patiently wait for about 2 minutes, before they ask. Yeah, all guys I know would know that Im very open about talkin about sex and kinky shite... but do they have to be so obvious? To the point where i have to laugh it off and say "that would cost you" and then they say they were kidding... but then about 15 minutes later they suggest it again.
Its quite funny that Ive been online savvy since 1993...but not until very recently allowed myself to have a digital camera or webcam. Its like I somehow knew that i would be tempted to get nakers and put the pics on the internet...and it wasnt until it was absolutely the WORST thing i could do that i actually bought the technology. I mean, if i got caught by a lawyer in town, word travels fast..and it would likely be the end of my career in calgary.
So I guess this is just a warning to my readers: dont expect me to post any T and A pics of myself on here...and if you see me on messenger, just dont ask. That being said, im going to go web chat some more. Fully clothed. Stop those thoughts, sicko.
Tuesday, February 01, 2005
A Trip to the [very similar] otherside...
A good friend of mine outed himself a few months ago... and I find it rather interesting that he and I have been having the same types of relationship woes and experiences ever since. Both of us found [then lost] a love made on the internet, have had rocky experiences with their ex, and had some kinky randoms in the last while. So when he suggested I travel to the local gay bar with him last weekend, I was totally up for it. Here are my observations:
--Its true, gay men are better dancers. There were a few obviously straight guys there. What made it obvious? They couldnt dance worth shit.
--Gay men are very coy. They dont just go up to each other and say 'hey want a drink?'. They dance up next to each other not looking at each other at first, then they slowly make eye contact...then they may talk to each other after the song is over. [ from what ive been told, they then make short work of leaving together and humpin like bunnies]
--Lesbians are NOT coy. Just ask the Ryan Malcom look-a-like who came up to me, put her hand on my arm and said 'What are you drinking, want one?'
--Everyone was just there to have a good time... although i am pretty sure that some of the boys were on E, everyone there had the whole good times vibe. Ah, the good ole raver PLUR.
Well, neither of us did pick up... instead we wandered our drunk asses home, got a pizza and wings and then passed out watching Homestarrunner. Guess our similarities with pick ups continues to what to do when we DONT pick up...
--Its true, gay men are better dancers. There were a few obviously straight guys there. What made it obvious? They couldnt dance worth shit.
--Gay men are very coy. They dont just go up to each other and say 'hey want a drink?'. They dance up next to each other not looking at each other at first, then they slowly make eye contact...then they may talk to each other after the song is over. [ from what ive been told, they then make short work of leaving together and humpin like bunnies]
--Lesbians are NOT coy. Just ask the Ryan Malcom look-a-like who came up to me, put her hand on my arm and said 'What are you drinking, want one?'
--Everyone was just there to have a good time... although i am pretty sure that some of the boys were on E, everyone there had the whole good times vibe. Ah, the good ole raver PLUR.
Well, neither of us did pick up... instead we wandered our drunk asses home, got a pizza and wings and then passed out watching Homestarrunner. Guess our similarities with pick ups continues to what to do when we DONT pick up...
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