No matter how juvenile it is, nothing... I repeat, NOTHING is as funny as calling the flowering vine Clematis Chlamydia...especially at the home and garden centre...and I just keep repeating it over and over again and not even once did the 70 year old lady helping me correct me or even bat an eyelash...
I spent Friday and Saturday this weekend holed up in a conference room and learning about interest based negotiation. No, I still dont really understand what it is. Hopefully ill learn that this weekend when it concludes.
What i did learn is:
1. I dont like having to spend my weekends learning.
2. My attention span is approx. 20 minutes. Then i either need to go get another cup of coffee, go to the bathroom, pretend i need to leave the room to make a call or just simply get up and move around. I get super bored if i just sit there and pretend to listen. (did i mention this course cost over 1500? haha yeah. remind me next time to just take the cash)
3. My clients are psychotic and need medical help-- when you hear that your lawyer is away for one day...do you automatically assume that you have been abandoned and that the whole file is falling apart? See, then you arent psychotic and need medical help.
On Saturday, as I was on my lunch break, there was this really cool Carribean parade going on down the street. I started to take pictures....and then a dude in a DJ booth yelled at me that I couldnt take pictures unless i danced. So, I did. Awesome,
Calgary is in the international news right now and for a less than honorable reason. In fact, its something that makes me hate this fucking city even more--especially that its considered front page news: Some fake breasted slut at Cowboys (the fake breasted slut bar in Calgary, BTW) started flirting with Prince Harry and they exchanged cell phone numbers. Now this chick and her double D balls of silicon are all over the news and shes acting like shes hating all this press and shit...oh fuck that. She already said her goal in life ( in life?! faahk) is to be a Playboy playmate...as if this isnt a big publicity stunt for this cunt (haha that rhymes) for her to get her plastic tits all over the press.
And thats all Im going to say about that.
Anyways. I need to go talk to my psychotic clients now.
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3 comments:
So I'm not the only one doing that chlamydia joke. I thought I was so original, too. : )
OK...related to the bimbo story: My cousin ruined his marriage by flaunting his relationship with a stripper all around town, right? Well now he and this stripper are living together and have babies and are in the newspaper for their fun rednecky hijinks (we're all so very proud). One Christmas she was talking to my mom and she proclaimed that the proudest moment of her life was when she was chosen to be a ring girl for the local tough man contest...
It saddens me that I'm subjected to such bimbo-osity...
Ok, reading Itchy's comment totally sidetracked me from what I was going to say.
Which wasn't anything helpful, I'm sure, but now I'm too busy being intrigued by Itchy.
I am full of intrigue. And my family is full of stupid...
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