Something smells-- is it your ass?

(Its good to know that my assistant and I are on a comfort level where when she smells something bad...she just assumes its me farting.)

I have personally declared today a 'force majeure'

For those of you who dont know what that is (or havent entered it in wikipedia yet) here you are lazybones:

Force majeure (French for "greater force") is a common clause in contracts which essentially frees one or both parties from liability or obligation when an extraordinary event or circumstance beyond the control of the parties, such as war, strike, riot, crime, act of God (e.g., flooding, earthquake, volcano), prevents one or both parties from fulfilling their obligations under the contract.

No, its not from volcanoes (although how cool would that be? fuck i love volcanoes) but from the giant storm/flood/deluge that is taking over the city. It took 40 minutes to get to work today because all the lights were out and all underpasses have flooded. Yesterday we had an electrical storm that knocked out the power for hours and started fires everywhere and hail. It was almost biblical ( although no frogs-- but there was a freaked out little lizard in my house)

I played rescue ranger last night (and yes...if you recall that Disney cartoon, I DID in fact sing the Rescue Ranger theme song while i did it...) and ran around covering the tomato, zuchini, and pepper plants in the yard and managed to pull most of the flower pots into the laundry room. I was soaked. It looked and felt like i jumped in a lake. And with the power out, I couldnt blow dry my hair or stand in front of the heater. By the time Jer came home from his hockey game, I looked like Amy Winehouse with my crazed hair and smeared make up. Hot.

I also found out last night (after the power came back on) that there was a tornado touch down in my home town...and it was actually 2 blocks from where my sister lives. Fucking freaky.

All of my clients have called in and said they aint coming. Im trying to convince my bosses there is a force majeure clause in my work contract that says that i can go home...or at least get them to buy the office pizza.

A co-worker took these last night:





ps. what smells is not my ass...but actually the ceiling in my assistant's office. Its leaking and will prolly fall through at any time. Now THATS a force majeure!