Biker Babe

Okay, I thought I'd better post something next to this one... its a pretty good story.

Its Saturday night...Im wasted on Red Bull and Vodka and cant stop singing "Hollaback Girl" after a fun- filled [although my pal never picked up as planned]night at the gay bar. We go into the local convenience store called "Macs" [do they have those elsewhere, or are they a Canadian invention? Kinda a rip-off of 7-11 but with its own Subway Sandwich counter] and purchase my secret weapon for hangovers: Blue Gatorade. Some total neandrathals at the sandwich counter were talking shit about how everyone in the Macs was "gay" or "ugly" or "fat" [the irony being that they were fat and ugly and no woman with any respect would sleep with either of those frat boy wanna bes] and they were totally pissing me off. They were picking on some 16 yr old punk kid when i just about lost it... I thought i might had to open a can of whupass on them. I hate assholes and am mouthy enough to say something to cunts like that when im sober...when ive been drinking RBVs Im a friggin freight train of rage...
But, for some unknown reason i decided to play it cool. Bought my Gatorade. Smiled at the cashier... and went in the back alley behind the Macs to rant loudly about how much i hate jackasses like that... and i saw it. The little red tricycle. All of a sudden my red bull induced rage was gone. I got really excited and decided i needed to ride it. It was really fun and i only bashed up my knees on it about six times [and, naturally, have someone take a pic of me doing such].

I actually went back to get it on Monday... being that it was in pretty good condition and someone had throw it out. I was going to go drop it off at one of those salvation army places that sells stuff cheap to poor people. Some little kid coulda gotten as much enjoyment out of it as me [although likely not on a redbull rampage]. But it was gone. Sigh.

[enter scene of me 40 years from now of screaming "Rooooosebud!!!"]