Small woodland creatures

Thought I'd take this opportunity to discuss one of the odd things in my life that gives me neverending joy... not booze, not boys, not my bike....but tiny animals.

Yeah, i really dig small woodland creatures. [and no, prevert, not in a sexual way] I realised this today after the really crappy commute to work today.

I ride the train for approx. 40 minutes each way every day...and thats after walking to the station which takes upwards of 10 minutes. I get on the train[groan] , wait for all the jackaninnies that work downtown to get off at third street station [where i, too, useda work when i was all about being waydowntown] so i can sit down [ug] , fight not falling asleep until my stop[blah] , then grudge up the stairs....until....

I see the little prairie dogs frolicking, scampering, and being utterly and vapidly happy and i cheer up. Sometimes there are really fat ones and i pretend that hes the king/boss/ undisputed leader of the gophers and he gets first dibs on food and, naturally, the chicks. Sometimes there are ones that dont stay on the hill and grass and instead scamper along the sidewalk and road. I think that those are the daredevils of the prairie dogs... like its Fear factor or maybe Jackass..and they are really the cool dogs to hang with. Better yet, maybe they are the explorers looking for a place for a new PD kingdom.....

Anyways, so i really like the gophers at Southland station. Being amused at them sure beats returning to smoking or chronic potsmoking or binge eating to be cheerful in the morning. And dont even get me started on the adventures of the squirrels at Jer's place... those mofos have it goin on!

while u all wait patiently for juicy to actually blog something

... why dont you check out my pics of mexico at www.juicyhumps.blogspot.com

lotsa drinking, partying, and, naturally, humping.

ps note that i changed my headline...

Status Report: April 05

[ever notice that i do these when im being lazy?]

1. Back in Canada-- port-o-blog entries from Mexico still need to be added. Man oh man it was a blast though. Drinkin, humpin, eatin, and having the ocean do a Ike Turner on my ass. Thats how juicy likes to partay

2. Gots me a job-- pretty hectic, thats why i havent been a bloggin lately. Looks like im a family lawyer now. Seems pretty good.

3. Thinking about getting a car. Seriously. Me. Really i am.

4. The moogle is good. I even moogle him. Yeah, thats in the port-o-blog too.

Everything's Coming up Juicy!

So... that last post? Yeah, I take it back. Cuz uh, er, i, uh.... got a job!

Yeah, seriously. Its fucked. Im finally going to be working after almost 10 mths. And whats even more fucked, is that im gonna be doing family law [ something of which i have absolutely noooo experience] . Wow.

And perfect timing, too... i leave for Mexico in 13 hrs [wahoo] and can party it up and have fun knowing that i actually have something to come back to...

A job, a beach vacation, a boy.... what happened to the shitty existance i knew and became oh so accustomed? Well, wish me luck. Not that ill need it to lay on sundrenched beaches and drink cocktails from 10 am to 1 am....

A one-sided conversation with the the law firms of Calgary:

Hey Asshole,

Fuck you. Yeah, you heard me. F-uuuuu-hhhhh-ck Youuuuu!

What im not good enough for you? Huh? Because Im not a conservative voting, boring looking, male motherfucker whose related to so-and-so and whose father is Mr. Richy Richerson and whose uncle is the CEO of some bigmotherfuckingcompanythatgivesyoumillionsinbusiness?

And whats that? No, I didnt go to high school/university/church with your kids/cousin/nephew? Sorry. Didnt know it was that important.

Actually, I articled at a big firm, yeah thats right, thats the one... no, you have met me before...you prolly just thought that i was the court reporter at that discovery...

And yes this IS my third martini....and No, that does not mean that you can stare at my ass...

Ill hear from you in 2 to 3 weeks? Ill be holding my breath. Honestly, I will be. And thank you, best luck in yer fucking future endeavours too...



[yeah: still no job. still no more interviews. getting a little angry. Tomorrow: a one-sided conversation with the headhunter companies in Calgary...]