Wednesday, December 21, 2005

Christmas cookie recipe

A few people sent me this this year... like they think they know me or something. But if they really knew me, they would know that i prefer to get stoned before i bake...not drunk.
...
It is that time of the year so here is another copy of the recipe that you probably
misplaced last year!

Christmas Cookie Ingredients:

1 cup of water
1 tsp baking soda
1 cup of sugar
1 tsp salt
1 cup of brown sugar
lemon juice
4 large eggs
1 cup nuts
2 cups of dried fruit
1 bottle Jose Cuervo Tequila


Sample the Cuervo to check quality. Take a large bowl, check the Cuervo
again, to be sure it is of the highest quality, pour one level cup and
drink.


Turn on the electric mixer...Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy
bowl.


Add one teaspoon of sugar...Beat again.


At this point it's best to make sure the Cuervo is still OK, try another
cup ... just in case.


Turn off the mixerer thingy. Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck
in the cup of dried fruit. Pick the frigging fruit off floor...


Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers just pry
it loose with a drewscriver.


Sample the Cuervo to check for tonsisticity.Next, sift two cups of salt, or something. Who giveshz a sheet.


Check the Jose Cuervo. Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.


Add one table. Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink.


Whatever you can find.


Greash the oven.

Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over.

Don't forget to beat off the turner.

Finally, throw the bowl through the window, finish the Cose Juervo and
make sure to put the stove in the dishwasher.

CHERRY MISTMAS

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Got the cards. Thanks!!!

I love cards that mention poo and farts.

CBK said...

Hey, you just spoiled it for me, JJ!

JuicyA said...

I dont think I mentioned poo and farts on yours, CBK, just on JJ and JDs. Its in homage to the fact that i have his sticker on my fridge which talks about farts, the note he wrote me was about farts, and he likes to talk about poo, generally.

Anonymous said...

True, true, and true.

Monty said...

OK, you can cook with me. We do all nekkid cooking, naturally!